And Her Measurements Are...
by Glamourcat
Summary: Lina and Gourry are rescued by a standoffish bounty hunter-much to Gourry’s joy and Lina’s disgruntlement.


Title: And Her Measurements Are.  
  
Author: Glamourcat  
  
Date: 4/27/01 6:55pm  
  
Author's Note: Lina, and Gourry belong to Slayers. Jade Aero, the Hunter, is my own original character and you can't have her. This story takes place in-between Slayers: Next and Slayers: Try.  
  
Summary: Lina and Gourry are rescued by a standoffish bounty hunter-much to Gourry's joy and Lina's disgruntlement.  
  
Light broke through the trees as the tall blonde haired man dressed in blue armor walked with his arms behind his head, not really paying attention to where he was going. His companion, a short red haired woman dressed in a garish pink and yellow outfit with a black cape followed along behind him, considerably less chipper then he.  
  
"Gourry! How can you walk so fast? Aren't you as hungry as I am?" She complained.  
  
"Oh, Lina, really. We just left town an hour ago. It hasn't been long enough yet for me to get hungry." Gourry answered, pausing for a moment and scanning his eyes along the brush on either side of the path. He froze and put his hand on the hilt of his sword.  
  
"Gourry? What?" Lina stopped when he did and glanced around, suddenly afraid. "Do you see something?"  
  
"Maybe." His eyes narrowed as he focused on one spot just ahead of them. "You can come out now. I know you're there."  
  
"Well, I give you more credit then I normally would have." A rough voice spoke from the bushes. Out stepped a cloaked man, dressed all in black. He had a dark thick mustache and a squared chin. "Most of our victims never notice us until it's too late. BOYS!"  
  
Bandits sprang from the bushes until Lina and Gourry were completely surrounded.  
  
"So, what do you have to say for yourselves now?" The bandit leader crowed.  
  
"I'd say anyone else but us would be worried. I'm not because I'm Gourry Gabriev, and my companion here is none other then Lina Inverse, the famous sorceress." Gourry drew his sword and braced himself. "I probably won't even get to have any fun, cause I'm sure Lina's got a fireball with your name on it!"  
  
"Um.Gourry." Lina looked downcast and twiddled her fingers in embarrassment. "You're gonna kinda have to do this on your own."  
  
"Huh? Why?" Gourry backed off from his guard stance in confusion.  
  
"Well.um, it's kinda that time of the month." Lina whispered, blushing.  
  
"WHAT! IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH! WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME THESE THINGS BEFORE WE LEAVE?" Gourry exploded.  
  
"Well, well, well." The bandit leader laughed. "If it's that time of the month, then even the great Lina Inverse is useless. My men! Attack!"  
  
The outlaws sprang forth and drew their weapons, charging the two. An arrow immediately shot one down. Another caught fire while still another froze mid-step, his feet incased in ice. Arrow after arrow rained down on them until Gourry and Lina stood stock still in the middle of the chaos. The bandit leader was screaming at his men, who were in a complete rout.  
  
"What are you idiots think you're doing? Get back here and fight! There are just two of them; this has to be some sort of trick! HEY!"  
  
"Lina, what's going on?" Gourry asked.  
  
"I have no idea. But for right now, whatever's happening is a good thing." She replied.  
  
"You will not get away with this! The Wolf Paw Gang will always remember and avenge its own!" The bandit leader danced with anger, making empty threats.  
  
"Oh shut-up." A new voice answered the man.  
  
"Huh? Who said that?" Lina looked around surprised.  
  
The bandit had his eyes fixed on a spot just behind Lina and Gourry. The evil man froze in terror, pointing. "No.it can't be.it's, it's.AH!"  
  
He turned and tried to run, but was struck right in the rear with a fire arrow. The cloaked man burned, and then fell over. Lina and Gourry turned to look behind them to see the source of the man's fear and the fire arrow.  
  
A woman, average in height and weight, dressed in doeskin leathers stood behind them. Her hair and face covered by a hood and mask, she still held her bow in one hand, the other hand halfway to the quiver strapped to one thigh just in case the leader of the thieves moved.  
  
"Hey. Were you the one who did all this? And with just specialty arrows?" Lina asked. "That's pretty neat. We owe you our thanks!"  
  
The strange woman stood down from her guard stance and slung the bow over her shoulder, walking towards the two she'd just rescued.  
  
"Hi! I'm Lina Inverse, you've probably heard.of...me?" Lina had stretched a hand out to the stranger to shake hands in introduction and was put off when the woman didn't even look at her as she walked by.  
  
The stranger started to examine the body of the leader. She shrugged, and then tied his arms and legs together with cording from a pocket on her cloak. One by one she gathered up the members of the gang she'd defeated and tied them all up.  
  
"Um, hey. Hello? Hi there! Sheesh!" Lina kept trying to get the other woman's attention and failing. "What a rude person! Don't you think so Gourry?"  
  
There was no answer. Lina turned to her friend. "Gourry?"  
  
Gourry was standing stock still, pointing at the unfamiliar woman, his jaw dropped and his eyes wide.  
  
"Gourry? Are you all right?" Lina waved a hand in front of his face. "What's with you?"  
  
"That's, that's.Lina, do you realize who just rescued us?" Gourry stammered.  
  
"No, I don't! I've been trying to find out but she's so rude!"  
  
"Ah!" Gourry jumped away from the small red head as if she had the plague. "You don't call a woman like her names! That's the Hunter!"  
  
"The Hunter? I've never heard of her!"  
  
"Oh really Lina, you should know who the Hunter is!" Gourry snapped back into a normal pose, crossing his arms and taking an admonishing tone with her. "I mean you know all about Darklords and demons and monsters and stuff but you don't know about the most important woman in modern history!"  
  
"What do you mean the most important woman in modern history? If anyone should be the most important woman it should be me!" Lina thundered.  
  
The Hunter turned from her task of tying up the last bandit and stared at the two companions, with an eyebrow raised. She shrugged, and lifted that body up, walked over to the pile she'd been making of them and dropped it on top.  
  
"So who is this Hunter woman anyway?" Lina finally asked.  
  
The clearing suddenly went dark, and a spotlight lit up the area that Hunter was standing on. The woman stopped tying the last body to the others and stood up, looking around.  
  
"What the Heck?" She said. "AH!"  
  
Gourry pushed her into the center of the spotlight, taking up his narration with a microphone, listing her accreditations, "Her name is Jade Aero, better known to her enemies as THE HUNTER, for her relentless pursuit of her quarry. Born in a land distant from here and raised in a communal setting by the priests and priestesses of The God of the Hunt. This is where she acquired her ability to track anything over every type of terrain. Finding the atmosphere of the Temple stifling, she set out into the world to make her fortune as a bounty hunter. The Hunter has since then become one of the most sought after agents in all the lands and been responsible for the capture of some of the worst known criminals ever!"  
  
"How do you know all that about me?" The Hunter asked, blinking in surprise.  
  
"I bought your biography for $19.96!" Gourry pulled the book out of nowhere and proudly displayed it. "Look! It's even got a pin-up!"  
  
A three-page foldout dropped down from the center of the novel. Gourry stared at the pin-up, slightly drooling.  
  
"HEY! HOW THE HELL DID THAT GET IN THERE!" Hunter unslung her bow in one fluid motion and pulled a fire arrow from her quiver. She lit the arrow, aimed and released. It hit the book, burning not only the pin-up, but Gourry as well.  
  
"Well, I can't say that I blame her." Lina said, rubbing the back of her head. "You were being kinda a pervert."  
  
"Well who could blame me? Traveling around with you and your flat chest." Gourry dusted himself off, trying to remove the soot. "At least Jade Aero has 40-36-40 measurements."  
  
"HOW THE HELL DID YOU KNOW THAT?" The Hunter shouted. "And will you get rid of this stupid spotlight! Are you people insane?"  
  
"Oh. Sorry." Gourry apologized and the lighting in the clearing returned to normal.  
  
Jade sighed. "I'm leaving. I've got to get the Wolf Paw Gang back to town so I can collect my reward. I hope you weirdoes make it to the next city on your own. Oh, and one more thing."  
  
The Hunter lit another fire arrow and let it fly straight at Gourry. "And that's for spouting off my measurements for all the world to hear."  
  
She turned, picked up the giant pile of bandit bodies and slung them over her shoulder and walked away. Leaving a burning Gourry, dancing back and forth trying to put the flames out.  
  
"Does this mean I can't get your autograph?" He called to the receding figure on the road, as he stopped to rest, patting out the fire on his bottom.  
  
"You jellyfish brain." Lina sighed patting him on the shoulder. "Come on. We've got to get going."  
  
Lina started walking in the opposite direction of the way the Hunter had taken. "And you know what Gourry?"  
  
"What, Lina?" Gourry said, following her, still trying to free himself from soot.  
  
"You're awfully lucky that she was the one who lit you on fire."  
  
"Huh? How is that lucky?" He asked, confused.  
  
"BECAUSE I SHOULD HAVE FOR THAT CRACK ABOUT HER HAVING BIGGER MEASUREMENTS!" Lina exploded, chasing him down the road shouting. "IF SHE HADN'T DONE IT I WOULD HAVE! I STILL MIGHT! GOURRY, YOU COME BACK HERE! GOURRY!" 


End file.
